This girl would have been number 5, and it was only about a year and a half ago, in Year 12, or first year of college.
So I've been at college for a couple of weeks or so, and I see this girl heading into the class opposite mine, and I think she's beautiful. Like really really gorgeous. Sexy and cute all at the same time. So I talk to her at some point for the first time, and I think one of my opening lines was something like "You look a bit like Grace from Will & Grace".
Now, in hindsight, that PROBABLY wasn't the best line ever seeing as Will & Grace is about as gay as you can get, but it was true and it just came out, like these things do. She laughed about it so I'd got away with it. Besides, Grace from W&G IS good-looking.
So we spend more time together and whatever, and she's a bit flirty and I'm a bit less flirty. This was before I developed any sense of balls or bravado when it comes to sex, I'd literally done nothing, so I was still a timid thing. Not sexy I realise. All my mates are saying "You need to tell her you like her man, cos she's WELL into you." So we hang out more, and I take her to a museum she really wanted to go to and we have a dead good time, and I'm thinking that this could maybe go somewhere; she's really attractive and I can actually hold a conversation with her which is equally sexy for me, unlike girl number 4.
But then after that, she starts to go cold on me. Doesn't respond to text or MSN messages etc. I start to get a bit pissed off and ask her why. I actually don't quite remember why we stopped liking each other. I think it was she got tired of waiting for me to make a move, and I was too stubborn in my timidness to accept it would have to be to make the move in the first place.
Turns out I had quite a lucky escape really. At her previous school, she was renowned for her sluttiness and she'd been around the block a fair few times so I wouldn't have been special to her. Actually that was one of the reasons why I got annoyed with her.
So yeah, that kinda put me off women, and I've been thinking about it a fair bit, and I think that at 18, most girls have had some form of sexual contact with another guy, so they know what they like etc. I haven't been with a girl, so in my mind, I guess I feel like I'll be intrinsically appalling at it, and won't be able to pleasure them, especially with all the hype around female orgasm and whatever, it seemed to my lazy mind too much of a stumbling block to even bother attempting. Whereas guys, they're a lot easier in my experience haha. I don't know though, what do you guys think?
Have a good weekend fellas, have fun!
If you like men and you think you might like women, my only advice is to make sure those you choose for partners know this detail. It tells them a lot about you and not just your sexual preference in the moment. It tells them you are adventurous and willing to experience more in life and challenge yourself and take risks.
ReplyDeleteWomen who appreciate men who engage men understand a broader life experience without limits on partners. Men who appreciate women who engage women understand there are things that please women that a man can't provide.
Men are only easier because you can see an erection, you instinctively know what to do with that erection and it is obvious when you have done a damn good job. With the right woman, it is the same experience just without cock. Unless she owns a strap on and they are in heaven.
...and then you both are in heaven.
ReplyDeleteI think if it appeals on a sexual level then the only way to know for sure is to try it. But maybe the "I won't be any good/guys are easier" is more of a reasoning/justification exercise. For example I doubt an anxious 100% straight virgin would ever choose gay sex because he wasn't sure he could perform well enough with a girl. Do you see what I mean? Not sure I'm expressing it well there though, sorry.
ReplyDeleteMaybe a useful question to ask is, how do your current feelings about sex with a girl compare with how you felt before you had sex with a guy? What's different, and what's similar? Same excitement, spark, anticipation? In a lot of ways I think what goes on emotionally before having "taboo" sex for the first time is a much bigger hill to climb and you achieved that first, and rather well from your description. Kudos to you for your openness.
Anon, that all sounds very ideal, not sure I'm at that totally accepted stage in my own mind, if that makes sense, to be telling signif others, if I had any ahha.
ReplyDeletePeace Bro, suck it and see as they say lol. And yeah I do get what you're saying, but I'd reason that scenario to just reflect society's intrinsic values (how's about that for sociological bullshit ahah).
Sex with females at the moment feels like fear, nerves, tension and expectation. The only way I'd do it again if I ever did plucck up the courage to do it would be if it was incredible sex. And I mean, mind-blowing. But who knows. And danke schon for commenting loads, you're like my fairy-blogger-godmother hah ;)